Liam Gallagher is never going to read this interview. For starters, the Oasis frontman is pretty busy with his band. They're back at London's famed Abbey Road studios, recording Oasis' seventh studio album, which is being helmed once again by producer Dave Sardy. He started recording his first set of vocals for the 2008 release a week ago Tuesday, and so far things are going "really easy," Liam told Spinner. "Touch wood."

Another reason Liam isn't going to read this? If you know anything about Oasis and in particular, this well-coifed blue-eyed Mancunian that fronts them, then you can probably surmise, he's not a big fan of the computers or the Internet.

Though the band released -- via download only, the single 'Lord Don't Slow Me Down,' from their new DVD of the same name, a little over two weeks ago -- Liam had nothing to do with it. Other things we found out about when we rang the Oasis singer in London for a little Q&A action? His interest in eBay, what Beatles ghost visited him, being a rock 'n' roll dad and rather strangely, what would happen if Celine Dion attempted to get in the studio with Oasis. No, really.

So the new single had a download release. I never really thought of Oasis, or you in particular, as being an 'Internet guy.'

I'm not really, but I wasn't singing on it, so it had absolutely f*** all to do with me. I don't know why it was done, I don't want to know why it was done and I don't care. I like the song, but I don't know why it was done. I don't get involved in any of that. If someone wants me to sing, I'll sing and wherever it goes, it goes.

Being sort of a classic kind of guy, I'd imagine you'd want things to be released on vinyl.

Yeah, totally, but f*** knows man. I suppose you've got to move with the times, haven't ya?

Do you even own a computer?

Yeah, I got a computer.

Do you e-mail?

Nah. I just ... nah. I don't do anything. Me missus [former All Saints singer Nicole Appleton] uses it. I don't get e-mail. I wouldn't know how to do anything like that. It's sort of like, I can get on eBay and look at things.

Have you bought anything?

I buy some clothes on there now and again, some instruments, bits and bobs. Nothing mad. I'm not obsessed with anything. I'm not an obsessive person. If I find myself getting really into it, I move on to the next thing. It's not good to be obsessed.

On the 'Lord Don't Slow Me Down' DVD, there's quite a bit of family stuff. Did they come out quite a lot on the that tour?

They came out -- I think they came out to New York, and then they came out to Canada. I think that was it. My missus is from Canada so she came to that bit. They came out for a week or something, but not all the time 'cause the kids have got school. We sort of don't do all that private tutoring and stuff. Plus, I pay too much for them to go to private school so I f***ing want my money's worth.

Do they enjoy private school?

I don't think they know what it is. I think they just go to school. It's good for me, because I'd rather put me kids through school than spend me money on, f***ing you know, other things. It's important that they get a good education 'cause who knows what's around the corner.

When they are on school holidays, do you bring them out now that you're older and can afford it?

When they get older, I'd love to bring them out on a proper tour -- just me and the kids. But we'll see. We haven't done it yet. I can't wait for them to get about 10 or 11, and they can make their own breakfasts and stuff like that.

Do your kids get what you do? Do they understand who their dad is?

They get it, yeah. They understand who I am. I don't think they understand all that s*** that people keep mithering me for -- asking for things and pictures. Some of the time they think that's cool, and other times they get embarrassed by it ... but don't we all.

I spoke to Tom Meighan from Kasabian when they toured with you and he was saying you got along in a crazy way -- you had your own language. He even said if he was a woman, he'd be having your babies.

Well, that's -- f***ing hell, that's a bit of a mad [one] then, that's considering he'd be a f***ing good looking woman.

What did you think of him when you first met him?

I met him at a gig. They were supporting [Oasis' former rhythm guitarist] Bonehead's band -- some f***ing shit band Bonehead was in at the Death Disco, [former Creation Records boss] Alan Mcgee's [club]. I'd never heard of him. I walked past and they were cool. We just got a drink. I wasn't there long and that was it -- that was all I remember. And then I obviously started seeing the f***ing band -- he's f***ing great. He's got good energy. I like people like that.

The way that it came off from him -- it's in your DVD -- he's so enthusiastic about you guys. Did he become a sort of cousin or little brother to you?

He was and he still is. I love him dearly. And I'd definitely look after him, and he looks after me. We're just both on the same kind of thing. I wouldn't look down and go, "Oh, you're my little brother." He's a grown man and he's doing his thing. We're all in the same f***ing boat.

Recently, the U.K. tabloids have been saying that you've been visited by John Lennon's ghost.

I wouldn't say that he visits me. I had an out of body experience when I was about 17 or 16, and as far as I'm concerned, that's when I started getting into music. That's when it all started going down, and I reckon it has something to do with him. He don't come and visit me -- at least, I don't think he does. I wish he did.

Any plans for bringing anyone in for the new Oasis album?

I don't think so but who knows. I'm not all for that stuff. I don't like that. That's like you're getting old before your time. I'm sure our kid [Noel Gallagher] will pull out some of his f***ing mates and go, "Yeah, come and play it," but that's not for me. I couldn't give a f***. No one will be singing my bits anyway.

Who could out sing you?

This is it -- nobody.

I suppose someone like Celine Dion would give it a go.

I don't think she'd get in the f***ing door.

She's skinny. She could fit through a crack.

Yeah, but I'd see that big nose coming.

The Verve have been around London lately since reuniting. Have you seen them since they reformed?

No, we're busy. We, I wanted to go see them the other night at the Roundhouse, but it's just -- we've got to do this record. We'll go out and meet with them -- they've been on the piss for three days -- so I'll catch up with them at the arena tour.

You guys were quite close with them.

I haven't seen them for ages, but I'm glad they're back.

And glad the Spice Girls are back?

Oh, f***ing over the moon.

Lastly, what is Liam Gallagher doing for Christmas?

My mates got a gaff in Switzerland, and we're going out there with the kids for five or six days just to hang out. I don't think we'll be doing any skiing, but I'll be there looking like James Bond with the kids -- just throwing snowballs and s***.