C'mon, why so glum? First there were the protests against sensational press coverage of a supposed emo suicide in the UK. Now, Russian legislators are considering a formal crackdown on unruly bangs, black nail polish and other stylistic badges of goth culture.

The music of bands such as My Chemical Romance and their Russian equivalents is being blamed in the State Duma for a "spiritual and ethical crisis" among Russian youth -- depression, "anti-social behavior" and yes, the glorification of suicide. Hey, their prime minister isn't exactly a bowl of sunshine, either.

"This is the first step in the public discourse," said Alexander Grishunin, an adviser to the lawmaker who is sponsoring the bill. If so, that's some discourse they've got there: One little whimper or woe-is-me, and they pass a law against it.

"Expressing psychological emotions is not forbidden by law," fumed Dmitry Gilevich, drummer for the Russian emo band MAIO. Oh, yes. In fact, they have ways of making you talk.

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