Air Guitarist Goes 'Crazy' to Win U.S. Championship

Posted on Aug 13th 2008 4:00PM by Benjy Eisen
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Representing bedroom rockers, bathroom mirror superstars, and, now, the United States of America, air guitarist Hot Lixx Hulahan rode his imaginary guitar to victory in the Cuervo Black U.S. Air Guitar Championships last week, held at the Regency Ballroom in San Francisco. In the winning round, Hot Lixx performed an unrehearsed segment of Ozzy Osbourne's 'Crazy Train' in front of a packed crowd of -- not surprisingly -- audience air guitarists and their forgiving girlfriends.

The competition included Derek Not-So-Smalls from Cleveland, who let a fireball rip from his palm at the end of his solo, and Brooklyn's Bettie B. Goode, who lost one of her toes during a previous competition. Unlike her instrument, the toe was real. Speaking of injuries, Hot Lixx himself broke his thumb during the first round of the finals (from playing a guitar made out of air, remember) but, far from getting medical attention, stayed in the venue to compete in Round Two.

Originally representing Washington DC, Hot Lixx will now move forward as the U.S. representative at the World Championships in Finland, where he will no doubt continue to be a legendary shredder in his own mind.