IFLTS: 'Wanna Be Startin' Somethin,'' Michael Jackson

'Wanna Be Startin' Somethin,'' Michael Jackson
From 1982's 'Thriller'

It's hard to put my finger on exactly why I freakin' love this 'Thriller'-opening track. I think it's mostly because this song is weird. Weird, frenetic genius.

I won't bore with superlatives about how much the album 'Thriller' shaped my musical childhood. It pretty much defined it. Years of obsession with Michael Jackson and literally everything he did. I taped all of his videos off of MTV and had his poster on my wall. The 'Making of 'Thriller'' VHS was a prized possession. I once made a horror-film challenged friend watch it, and the behind-the-scenes film scared her so badly she got a bloody nose all over my mother's beige living room carpet. That's commitment.

But this song stands out in the oeuvre (so much for no superlatives) that is 'Thriller' as the song that I can go back to over and over again today, and think to myself, "I still have no clue what the hell this song is talking about, and it doesn't even matter."

"You're a vegetable"? OK. "You're just a buffet"? Alright. "Hee haw!" Got it. Don't even try to make sense of this wacky twist on a gossip folks tale. (Stalker-fan character Billie Jean even makes an appearance.) Just bob your head and lose yourself to the thundering rhythm. Seriously, you have no soul if chanting "Mama-se, mama-sa, mama-ma-coo-sa" doesn't make you grin like a fool.

In reading about this song, Wikipedia told me that it was intended for the 'Off the Wall' sessions. I'm so grateful that it didn't end up lost forever in the archives somewhere, because if it had, my musical life would have been six minutes and two seconds less joyful.

I will miss you, Michael, and I thank you for each and every "Hee, hee, hee!" and "Woo, hoo!"



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