Spinner

Christmas Number One Hits and Misses

With Rage Against the Machine beating Joe McElderry to take the Christmas number one crown for 2009, the fight for Britain's Yuletide chart-topper was more entertaining than any in the last five years. As pop commentators and music fans have been quick to point out, there used to be a traditional battle for the charts before 'X Factor'.' Here we look at a few of the hits and misses

'Mad World,' Michael Andrews and Gary Jules (2003)
Sombre, contemplative cover of the Tears For Fears classic for the 'Donnie Darko' soundtrack. Too depressing for Christmas? Not at all.
Verdict: Hit

'Earth Song,' Michael Jackson (1995)
It might have been the peak of Britpop, but the Christmas charts were instead topped with this bile-inducing slab of Messianic nonsense.
Verdict: Miss

'Stay Another Day,' East 17 (1994)
A bit of rough at Christmas. The Walthamstow boyband get festive with a prime slice of under-the-mistletoe schmaltz.
Verdict: Hit

'Mull of Kintyre,' Wings (1979)
Seemingly endless cod-Celtic epic on the joys of having a second home in Scotland.
Verdict: Miss

'Daytripper,' The Beatles (1965)
John Lennon's blast at "weekend hippies" became a Yuletide chart-topper in 1965. Aaah. Simpler times.
Verdict: Hit

'Ernie, the Fastest Milkman in the West,' Benny Hill (1971)
Unreconstructed comedian Hill's novelty single filled with groanworthy innuendo.
Verdict: Miss

'Don't You Want Me,' Human League (1982)
The sound of the future, according to the New Romantics. Clearly enough of us were convinced by the sci-fi haircuts to make it a Chrimbo number one.
Verdict: Hit


'Two Little Boys,' Rolf Harris (1969)
Harris' ode to childhood generosity and then wartime derring-do. Just plain odd, if not actually creepy.
Verdict: Miss

'Sound of the Underground,' Girls Aloud (2001)
Aside from Will Young, they're the only reality show contestants to muster several years in the biz. No mistake when the likes of this pop gem tops the charts.
Verdict: Hit

'Mary's Boy Child,' Boney M (1978)
The robotic disco of the German formed dancefloor sensation sounds oddly joyless when they're supposed to be proclaiming the miracle of our Saviour.
Verdict: Miss

'Reet Petite,' Jackie Wilson (1986)
Fifties legend Wilson's hit recovered from the vaults thanks to a Levi's commercial. The horns alone are enough to bring festive cheer.
Verdict: Hit

'Hallelujah,' Alexandra Burke (2008)
Cred to the 'X Factor' crowd for taking a Leonard Cohen classic and making it a Christmas number one? Not on your nelly. This was about as passionate as three-day-old porridge.
Verdict: Miss

'Always on My Mind,' Pet Shop Boys (1987)
Presley oldie given a spring to its step thanks to the Smiths you could dance to. Joyless is the foot that remains still during this one.
Verdict: Hit

'Can We Fix It,' Bob the Builder (2000)
The sound of a nation's mums being pestered for pocket money in the CD aisle of their local supermarket.
Verdict: Miss

'Moon River,' Danny Williams (1961)
One of the most popular songs of the 20th Century, this stone-cold Henry Mancini classic might not be about Christmas, yet still sounds like the perfect Christmas song.
Verdict: Hit

'Save Your Love,' Renee and Renato (1982)
The world's biggest practical joke? An Italian waiter and friend are catapulted to the top of the Christmas charts with histrionic caterwauling. Frightful.
Verdict: Miss

'Return to Sender,' Elvis Presley (1962)
The King of Rock 'n' Roll's ode to mail delivery problems clearly struck a chord round Christmas time.
Verdict: Hit

'Something Stupid,' Robbie Williams and Nicole Kidman (2001)
Were they? Did they? Not if the chemistry in the video was anything to go by. They looked like a divorced couple smiling through one of the kids' graduation photos.
Verdict: Miss

'Do They Know It's Christmas?' Band Aid (1984)
Charity-tastic meeting of major pop minds to raise money for Ethiopian famine. Much better than it had any right to be, especially considering Paul Young was involved.
Verdict: Hit

'Mistletoe and Wine,' Cliff Richard (1988)
Oh Cliff. We know you're a Christian. Just do us a favour and re-release 'Devil Woman' one Christmas. That'd be ace.
Verdict: Miss

All the AOL Music info you want to know

50 Cent, Street King: Rapper Visits…

The Boombox

AP Photo/World Food Programme, Rose Ogola NAIROBI, Kenya (AP) - Rapper 50 Cent…

Grammy Acceptance Speeches: Watch 30…

AOL Music Blog

FilmMagic, Getty, WireImage It's been a busy week for God. Besides helping…

Earl Sweatshirt Returns, Releases New…

The Boombox

YouTube.com Ironically, Earl Sweatshirt was one of the most visible members…

See all AOL Music »

Add a Comment

Sign in »
*0 / 3000 Character Maximum

20 Comments

Filter by:
John


'Day Tripper' had nothing whatsoever to do with 'a blast at "weekend hippies" '. Hippies weren't invented until two years later - 1967.

December 25 2009 at 12:39 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
frank

I just wish you lot had some concepy of grammar and could slell. Have all my taxes been wastwd.

December 25 2009 at 10:19 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to frank's comment
frank

Now I understand!!! This column cannot transcribe English correctly.

December 25 2009 at 10:27 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
twistybits

by the looks too much festive grog and Moon river sung the fab Andy William morphs into the lesser known version by 'Danny' Williams the famous crooning milkman from Southend...lol...
Anyway as someone's already said how's about Slade Merry Christmas Everybody December 1973 ?

December 25 2009 at 8:00 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
me

If you want true christmas songs just listen to Nat King Cole or The Carpenters-- pure pleasure the songs may not have been a no 1 but by ek they tek some beating, do you agree?????????

December 21 2009 at 7:06 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
rocker

what about slade i seem to think that SO HERE IT IS MERRY CHRISTMAS was a christmas number one twice

December 21 2009 at 6:13 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
eddie

Christmas is a Joke these Days.Its all about Money and more Money.Kids been spoiled which makes them spiled Kids with no Idea what Christmas is all about.
Every Singer jumps on the Bandwaggon to make some Money too.Lets spend the Money everyone struggles to pay for on something worthwhile such to take Care of the Elderly,give Gifts to the RSPCA,Born Free and similar.
Much more rewarding indeed

December 21 2009 at 2:16 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Ged F

comments on Renee and Renato in very poor taste, as Renato died in the last 6 months. He was very proud of reaching number one.

December 21 2009 at 1:14 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Ged F's comment
simon

right on mate, i love heavy metal, but i loved this song. they both have great voices!! sad to learn of his death. R.I.P.

December 21 2009 at 3:01 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Griffltd

AMERICA..........................ENGLAND.
BARRACK OBHAMA...................GORDON BROWN.
JONNY CASH.......................NO CASH.
BOB HOPE.........................NO HOPE.
STEVIE WONDER....................NO F*****G WONDER
ROCK ON THE REVOLUTION.

December 21 2009 at 12:02 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Griffltd's comment
proud to be english

america - no identity
obama- is it cuz i is black
bob hope - born english
stevie wonder- is it cuz i is black and blind-can he drive
america got in the shit in vietnam now we have to get them out of the shit in afghanistan and iraq.
dont see the yanks without a huge national debt

December 24 2009 at 8:16 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Dave McCracken

Who`s the Nerd that compiles this crap ?
Cliff Richard has done more for British Music
than most so called stars and has out lasted ALL british solo singers...so hey man have some respect, we all know you lot love to knock OUR CLIFF , do you get a kick out of being like this or is it just fashionable to knock Cliff ...get REAL !

December 21 2009 at 11:23 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
STEVIE

A SPACE MAN CAME TRAVELLING,CHRIS DEBURGH

December 21 2009 at 11:17 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply