With the long-awaited return of 'Glee' to TV, the question looms: What are they going to sing this season? If you're a Gleek, the possibilities dangle like luscious, tempting fruit. But if you, like Sue Sylvester, think the 'Glee' treatment destroys perfectly good songs, well, you really shouldn't be reading this. Here are the top 10 theme shows 'Glee' should tackle pronto!
We were teased with 'Glee' takes on 'The Safety Dance' and 'Total Eclipse of the Heart.' But New Directions would kill an all-'80s show. Imagine Mr. Schue serenading Emma with Level 42's 'Something About You,' Rachel beseeching Finn to Blondie's 'Call Me,' Santana rocking Joan Jett's 'Bad Reputation' and Mercedes doing a soul-sister Pat Benatar on 'Hit Me With Your Best Shot.' Top it off with a fabulously sappy ballad, say, Air Supply's 'All Out of Love' or Chicago's 'You're My Inspiration.'
Jurgen & Thomas, Retna
Our McKinley High outcasts have soul, so let 'em update some oldies. Annoyed with their love interests, Quinn, Tina and Rachel can mash up the Supremes' 'You Keep Me Hanging On' and the Chiffons' 'One Fine Day' as Kurt applies his shimmering falsetto to Frankie Lymon's 'Why Do Fools Fall in Love.' Puck can sing the praises of hot babes with the Big Bopper's 'Chantilly Lace.' And as for Mercedes? Ike and Tina's 'River Deep, Mountain High' would fit quite nicely.
A Canadian glee club takes a field trip south to McKinley High. Callum Keith Rennie guest-stars as a maple syrup-swilling smoothie sweet on Emma, who does a flirty rendition of Feist's '1234,' while Schue tackles Tegan and Sara's 'Back in Your Head' and Rachel does a heart-stopping cover of Joni Mitchell's 'Both Sides Now.' Then the group gives a rousing rendition of Arcade Fire's 'Rebellion (Lies),' complete with marching band (a la the MuchMusic Video Awards).
George Pimentel, WireImage
The British Invasion
A sexy Brit exchange student invades the high school halls, and guess what? She's a drop-dead soul diva who's a rival for Mercedes and puts Finn in a tizzy (she sings Estelle's 'American Boy' and he responds with Little Boots' 'New in Town'). Heartbroken Rachel expresses her frustration with La Roux's 'Bulletproof.' The icing on the cake? Puck channelling Robbie Williams. Add in Oasis, Blur, Lily Allen, Florence and the Machine ... and a little Beatles for good measure.
Andrew H. Walker, WireImage for VERSUS
Scheming Sue Sylvester plants a bag of weed in Mr. Schuester's office in a bid to get his ass fired. Principal Figgins believes in Schue's innocence but calls a lockdown. As students are searched, Schue indignantly assigns the kids to find protest songs. They return with M.I.A.'s 'Paper Planes,' Green Day's 'Minority' and the Dixie Chicks' 'Not Ready to Make Nice.' Close with a protest performance of Buffalo Springfield's 'For What It's Worth' and Twisted Sister's 'We're Not Gonna Take It.'
Kevin Winter, Getty Images
They've done Madonna, and Britney's on the way, so who could follow those pop powerhouses but Prince? Sue lets slip she once had a wild liaison with the Purple One, so New Directions decide to whip up a few Prince numbers to torment their nemesis. Prince songs all have that theatricality essential to a good 'Glee' cover: 'Little Red Corvette,' 'Kiss,' 'U Got the Look' -- and a 'Delirious' delivered by Sue in tribute to her past conquest. Plus, a rock-the-socks 'Purple Rain' medley to close the show.
Tim Mosenfelder, Getty Images
Viva la '70s
April's (played by Kristin Chenowith) roller rink is in jeopardy, and Mr. Schue fears she'll revert to her pill-popping, booze-swilling ways. The kids don't care about roller disco, so Schue and the Glee clubbers woo their parents with some '70s classics: Boston's 'More Than a Feeling,' Supertramp's 'Goodbye Stranger,' Marvin Gaye's 'Let's Get It On,' Al Green's 'Let's Stay Together' and Cheap Trick's 'I Want You to Want Me.' Plus, a booty-bouncing disco medley starring April herself.
Richard E. Aaron, Retna
Rumour has it Van Halen are touring small-town America. Principal Figgins is a huge fan, so he asks New Directions to put together a Van Halen tribute in hopes his idols might visit McKinley. Santana and Brittany do a cheeky turnabout on Mr. Schue with 'Hot for Teacher,' Artie embraces his hard-rock side for 'Running With the Devil,' Mercedes puts an R&B spin on 'Jump,' and Finn and Rachel tease each other with 'Finish What You Started.' Then they all 'Dance the Night Away.'
Lorne Resnick, Redferns
Alt Rock Forever
Grunge just seems too ... grungy, but the right arrangements could make alt-rock anthems work in 'Glee' guise. After the kids mock Shue's flannel-and-Doc Martens days, he assigns his favourites: Smashing Pumpkins' 'Today' (delivered in Kurt's yearning, breathy vocals), Weezer's 'Say It Ain't So,' Jesus and Mary Chain's 'Head On' and the Verve's 'Bittersweet Symphony.' And how about a crowd-pleasing cover of Fatboy Slim's 'Praise You,' complete with awkward dance moves from the video.
Robb D. Cohen, Retna
'Glee' made Journey relevant for a whole new generation, and now it's Miller time. There's the pleasing stoner-groove of 'Joker' (Puck), the subtle bounce of 'Jet Airliner' (Mercedes), straight-ahead banger 'Rock n Me' (Artie and Tina) and the perfect-for-a-showtune-treatment 'Swingtown' (the whole Glee Club). For a memorable finale, 'Take the Money and Run' is a high-energy Rachel/Finn showcase just waiting to happen. The Gangster of Love needs to be introduced to a whole new fanbase, and you'd better believe that 'Glee' can do it.